It is currently Sun Nov 19, 2017 12:31 am

All times are UTC - 8 hours




 Page 1 of 1 [ 4 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: ZMF Reviews Halloween 2
PostPosted: Sat Aug 29, 2009 2:16 am 
Adroit Pirate
User avatar

Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 12:00 pm
Posts: 5899
Location: 612 Wharf Avenue
Over on the AV Club review of Halloween 2, a regular named Zodiac Motherfucker -- sorry, ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER posted his own inimitable review, which I will paste here for your viewing pleasure.

If you've never experienced ZMF before, get ready to taste the pain.

ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER wrote:
I AM HERE TO SAY HOLY SHIT HALLOWEEN 2 FUCK THE FUCK YEAH I JUST GOT BACK FROM WATCHING THIS AND IM GOING TO TELL YOU RIGHT NOW I COULDNT BELIEVE WHAT THE FUCK I WAS SEEING ON THE SCREEN IT WAS BEYOND OWNAGE. IT WAS JUST FLATOUT FUCKING BRUTALITY. FOR REAL PEOPLE GETTING THE FUCK BEAT OUT OF THEM AND STABBED ALL TO FUCK EVERY FIVE MINUTES AND A LINEUP OF SOME OF THE AWESOMEST MOTHERFUCKERS EVER AND YOU KNOW WHAT THEY ALMOST ALL GET OWNED YOU GOT BRAD DOURIF YOU GOT CHIEF UNSER FROM THE SONS YOU GOT MARK BOONE MOTHERFUCKING JUNIOR YOU GOT THAT DUDE WHO FUCKED JACK BAUERS WIFE YOU GOT MALCOLM MCDOWELL YOU GOT RUFUS FIREFLY YOU GOT SHERI MOON ZOMBIE AS A GHOST YOU GOT THAT GUY WHO KILLED BRUCE WAYNES PARENTS YOU GOT HOT CHICAS WHOS NAMES I DONT CARE ABOUT YOU GOT AWESOME FAT GUYS WITH LAMBCHOPS FUCK I EVEN THINK THAT DUDE WHO FUCKED DUDES IN HIS BASEMENT WITH THAT PETER WELLER LOOKING MOTHERFUCKER IN PULP FICTION WAS IN IT AND I WANNA MAKE ANOTHER POINT RIGHT NOW DANIELLE HARRIS FUCKING OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWNS SHE MIGHT REALLY BE OLD AS FUCK BUT ID DATE HER ANYWAY

ONLY REAL DRAWBACK FOR ME IS THAT IT WASNT AS SCARY TO ME BECAUSE IM A BIG DUDE AND THERES NO WAY MICHAEL MYERS WOULD JUST TOSS ME AROUND LIKE THAT AND OWN ME BUT FOR ALL YOU FIVE FOOT SEVEN SCHOOLBOY CHEST HAVING MOTHERFUCKERS READING THIS THAT WONT MATTER

BOTTOM LINE ITS TOTAL FUCKING UNSTOPPABLE BRUTAL OWNAGE LIKE ONLY THE MASTER ROB ZOMBIE CAN PROVIDE AND I CAN NOT FUCKING BELIEVE THIS GOT AN R RATING BUT IM GLAD IT DID

HALLOWEEN 2 BITCH IT IS NOT OPTIONAL



_________________
Mike Olson
‎"In this economy, it's not easy to feed a growing family. So we eat Haunkkah gelt for dinner and look at a picture of broccoli." --Paul F. Tompkins
Spirit of the Blank: A blog.
Roll Some Dice: Another blog.
Offline
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Sep 16, 2009 9:08 pm 
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2003 3:00 am
Posts: 6640
Location: tecolote canyon
A review of Glee as what might've been written by ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER if he cared enough about the show to watch it:

HOLY FUCKING SHIT UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE THIS SHOW TOTALLY HAD THE FUCKING LOOKS TO BE CLEVER AND SMART AND FUCKING BREAKING THE MOTHERFUCKING MOLD BUT DID IT NO IT DID NOT

INSTEAD IT HAD SHITTY PREDICTABLE BULLSHIT SHIT AS PLOT WITH COMPLETELY FUCKING STEREOTYPICAL CHARACTERS AND OVERFUCKINGPRODUCED OVERFUCKINGCHOREOGRAPHED MOTHERFUCKING MUSIC NUMBERS "I WANNA SEX YOU UP" ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME IM SO GLAD I DIDNT PUT THIS ON MY FUCKING DVR LIST



_________________
Hey man, I'm slinging volume and fat stacking benjies, you know what I mean? I can't be all about spelling and shit!
Offline
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Sep 16, 2009 9:57 pm 
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2003 3:00 am
Posts: 6640
Location: tecolote canyon
A review of Jay Leno as what might've been written by ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER:

LOSE THE FUCKING CELEBRITY 10 QUESTION THING IT FUCKING SUCKS DONKEY BALLS MOSTLY BECAUSE JAY IS ABOUT AS EMPATHETIC AS A MOTHERFUCKING BAG OF ROCKS BUT ALSO BECAUSE THE QUESTIONS ARE SHIT



_________________
Hey man, I'm slinging volume and fat stacking benjies, you know what I mean? I can't be all about spelling and shit!
Offline
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 2:47 am 
User avatar

Joined: Mon Aug 11, 2003 11:00 am
Posts: 4900
Location: 1313 mockingbird lane
*chortle*


Offline
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
 Page 1 of 1 [ 4 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 8 hours


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

cron